We were home alone, and I was jumping around and cheering for her major accomplishment.  I called her dad, grandmothers, and some of my friends that owed me the opportunity to bore them with my child’s mundane milestones – as they had done to me years before.  Before learning to crawl, Nina had just been sitting around, frustrated with her seeming inability to get what she wanted. 

Ultimately, her goal is to walk.  Not the four-limbed-rear-in-the-air-ape-man walk, but the real 2-legged variety.  Despite this, I celebrated her crawling as though it was the biggest deal in the world.  She still can’t walk, so why did I bother rejoicing in a mere crawl?

Because it was significant progress.

A “step” in the right direction, proof that everything is coming together, and a cause for celebration, indeed.  I wasn’t alone in this thinking either.  Every person that I shared her exciting progress with was genuinely happy.  Amidst the congratulations and joy shared by all, it occurred to me that Nina must feel pretty darn encouraged. 

So why don’t women typically feel encouraged when they experience “crawling moments” while losing weight?

It’s simple.  Women don’t feel encouraged because, when it comes to weight loss, we all generally discount baby steps.  How many times have you heard, or even said, these things:

“Yeah, I walked today, but it was just around the block and I couldn’t run because my knees are so bad.”

“My doctor said that my cholesterol has gone down since the last visit, but I still have to lower my blood pressure, stop smoking, and drink more water.”

“I feel so much better since I started eating intuitively, but I still can’t fit into my old jeans.”

Comments like these completely negate the fact that you started moving, you reduced a major health risk, and you feel better about yourself.  The focus is on the ultimate end result (walking), and the wonderful milestones along the way (crawling) are being completely ignored.

Where’s your celebration?  Who are you calling to tell the good news? 

I challenge you to celebrate your milestones – big and small – with enthusiasm and verve.   And encourage other women when they share they’re little victories with you along the way. 

Everyone deserves to feel pretty darn encouraged.

Why do we discount baby steps? is a post from: Amber O'Neal

Why do we discount baby steps? ©, .

At the time, I couldn’t figure out my word, but it came to me last night when I was drifting off to sleep…

My word is passion.  Passion is what fuels my work and my relationships.  Sometimes passion works in my favor (like when I stay up all night long making changes to my website or when I search high and low for the perfect gift for a grieving friend), and sometimes it works against me (like when I lose my ability to function once I lose interest in something).  In either case, it is simply passion that drives nearly everything I do.

Right now, I’m passionate about helping my clients find happiness, health, balance, peace, and confidence.   Ironically, I’m also seeking these same things for myself.  Lately, the topic of balance as it relates to my eating has been front and center.

Some days, I feel like I could be a paid mascot for U.S. Food Pyramid.  I eat a bunch of whole grains and a variety of fruits and veggies that would leave anyone impressed.  Deep green, yellow/orange, and white veggies along with citrus fruits, crisp apples, and perfectly ripe apricots…just to name a few.

And other days, I’m wondering if I’m pregnant again (I’m not!) because I voraciously crave stuff that I normally don’t even think about.  Today is one of those days.  I’ve been eating ever since I woke up this morning, and my appetite seemingly just can’t be satisfied.  The strange thing is that I don’t actually have a taste for anything specific which seems like a bit of a waste.

In the past, I would have been freaking out right now – trying to figure out why my eating is all “messed up”, wondering why I want to eat, pray, love…and then eat again.  But not today.  That’s not to say that I don’t notice what my body is going through.  I do notice.  I’m just not bothered by it.  Because it all comes down to balance.  I trust her (my body) to tell me what she needs and wants, and if I listen to her with unwavering confidence, I know that she will always bring me back full circle.  She’s keeps me balanced.

Passionately balanced.

Eat, pray, love and then eat again is a post from: Amber O'Neal

Eat, pray, love and then eat again ©, .

I came across this concept – The Art of Living Well for the busy woman – on the Cris Simone website.

Cris Simone is an online beauty and wellness lifestyle resource for busy women. The site features interviews of well-known experts and professional women who share tips and reviews on some of the best products and services that promote beauty and wellness; weekly giveaways of some of those products and services; and more. Cris Simone launched in response to the growing demand for an online presence that served busy women and addressed their needs for work/life balance, health, wellness, and real beauty.

And guess what?  Yours truly is featured on there today with the Tip of the Day: Honor Your Hunger.

Check me out!

The Art of Living Well… is a post from: Amber O'Neal

The Art of Living Well… ©, .

I was asked to talk to the members of this co-op about proper nutrition and how to healthfully prepare the food they received from the food bank.  Easy enough.  Despite the fact that I was speaking for free (my personal community service), I still wanted to put my best foot forward.  I prepared a wonderful Powerpoint presentation full of cute pictures and loads of informative stuff.

When I arrived, I took one look around the room and realized that I had messed up.  

The environment just didn’t support my cute little Powerpoint presentation.   There was nowhere to set up my portable screen, the projector cord wouldn’t reach the outlet, and the room was eerily quiet – waiting for me to just get on with it.   There were church pews instead of office chairs, and it was hot as hell.   [Side note: I mean that as a literal description and not in a bordering-on-using-an-inappropriate-swear-word type of description]

The eyes looking back at me when I stood up to begin speaking clearly communicated that they didn’t want to hear about food groups or fiber.   My audience wasn’t interested in getting a lesson on reading labels or discussing the benefits vs. downfalls of artificial sugar substitutes.   They were only listening because they had to hear me out before receiving their weekly food allotment.   I got all of this without them ever uttering a word. 

My first thought…”Great. Lucky me.” << sarcastic resignation

My second thought…”Great!  Lucky me!” << excited realization

Why the instantaneous change of heart? 

It quickly occured to me that I don’t even like talking about food groups and fiber.  Nutrition labels and Splenda discussions bore me to death.   I dread being asked to blabber on about the stuff people learned in 7th grade health class.  Folks aren’t unhappy because they don’t know what to eat.  They’re struggling because they don’t know how to eat or why they eat.

So basically, I didn’t want to talk about that boring crap ANYWAY.

I chucked the Powerpoint, went to the middle of the room, and just started talking about food.  I talked about wonderful food that I knew my audience could identify with.  I talked about ways to make food even more flavorful and delicious.  I looked in their food pantry boxes and gave examples of what I would make for breakfast tomorrow if that was my box.  I didn’t talk about what NOT to eat – only about all of the great things that we CAN eat.

When I got done talking and was in the car on my way home, I recognized that this was one of my best speaking engagements ever.  No microphone.  No script.  No paycheck.  And no Powerpoint (eek – gasp!).  It was just me standing up there talking about food. 

Sometimes food is just food and nothing more.

Sometimes food is just food and nothing more is a post from: Amber O'Neal

Sometimes food is just food and nothing more ©, .

Do you find yourself feeling a tad bit envious of women who seem to never struggle with their weight?

The truth of the matter is that there’s no magic bullet that will solve all of your weight loss and body image issues.  And the fact that some women eat with ease, without obsessing about each and every bite or pound on the scale, is no secret.  Despite what you may think, there’s nothing particularly special about them, and they’re not just lucky…

They’ve just learned to successfully navigate through the 7 Eating Traps Every Woman Should Avoid, and I’ll show you how to do it, too.

On this call, we will:

1. Identify the eating traps that lead away from the Normal Eating Path
2. Learn why these traps tend to creep up again and again despite your best dieting efforts
3. Discover how to successfully avoid each trap without feeling deprived

Teleseminar Details:

Date: Thursday, August 26th
Time: 12pm EST (check the time in your area)
Cost: Gratis. Complimentary. No charge. In other words…It’s FREE.
Where: By telephone (call-in information will be sent to you by email when you register below)

You won’t want to miss the energy of the live call or the opportunity for some down ‘n’ dirty Q&A, but register for the teleseminar even if you can’t make it because I’ll email you the recording afterwards.

Teleseminar: 7 Eating Traps Every Woman Should Avoid is a post from: Amber O'Neal

Teleseminar: 7 Eating Traps Every Woman Should Avoid ©, .

It never ceases to amaze me when I see someone grab for the salt shaker before even tasting their food.  And they never seem to shake just a little bit.  They shake with gusto!  As I watch the salt hit their food, as I did this morning, I can’t help wondering whether they’re eating for pleasure or just out of habit? 

How could she possibly have known whether it needed additional salt before even tasting it?

Pleasure or habit?

I’ll admit that I may have been more sensitive to this today because I’d prepared the food myself and it had been seasoned well.  I do recognize that everyone’s taste buds are different, and I wholeheartedly believe in eating for pleasure.  So my issue isn’t that  a guest at my table poured on the salt, slatherd on lots of extra butter, or anything else.

It’s just a matter of WHY. 

When you add things to your food, are you doing it because it heightens your joy factor while eating?  Or because it’s what you’ve always done – what you’ve always seen others do?

Think about it, and adjust accordingly. 

I’m not suggesting that you suffer through bland food.  I don’t do that and wouldn’t want you to either.  I’m just asking that you experience the food before altering it.  Really taste it.  Consider how it feels in your mouth and how it satisfies you.  And then…season to taste.

Are you eating for pleasure? is a post from: Amber O'Neal

Are you eating for pleasure? ©, .

While on this path, your goal is to avoid getting too hungry before you eat because then it’s just too easy to overeat when you start out starving.  While on the Normal Eating Path, your primary focus is on regulating the amount of food – not the TYPE of food.

I witness the perfectly executed Normal Eating Path every day in my house.  My 9-month old daughter nurses and eats some pureed foods.  When she’s hungry, she is single-mindedly focused on nourishment.  She lets me know that she’s experiencing physical discomfort (hunger), and I’ve learned to read her clear signals BEFORE she’s starving. 

When she’s hungry, nothing else matters.  But when she’s full, she’s done.  Once the pangs of gentle hunger have been replaced with moderate fullness, she turns away from the breast or the spoon, and no amount of cajoling or prompting will get her to take another bite.

This is Normal Eating in its purest form.  Can we always eat like this?  Of course not, and perfection is not the goal.  You were, however, born knowing how to eat naturally – eating when you’re hungry, eating what you’re hungry for, and stopping when you’re full. This type of eating is known as attuned eating or intuitive eating, and that’s my specialty.

This week is World Breastfeeding Week.  Before having my daughter, I never knew such a thing even existed.  Now, I’m reminded of the beauty of nursing on a daily basis.  Heck, sometimes on an hourly basis when she practices intuitive eating during a growth spurt (smile).  Whether you’re a nursing mother or not, World Breastfeeding Week is a wonderful reminder to us all to slow down, savor the meal, and re-learn to eat like a baby.

Eat like a baby is a post from: Amber O'Neal

Eat like a baby ©, .

The better the food tasted, the more guilty I would feel. 

Fast-forward to last night.  My sister had a soon-to-expire gift certificate for Cafe Intermezzo – a local coffeehouse and dessertery that touts over 100 different tortes, tarts, cakes, pies and cheesecakes along with extensive drink options and food choices with international flair.

After perusing the menu, I settled in on the chicken, mango, avocado wrap…Yum!  There were tons of things on the menu that looked good, but I chose this because the combination of ingredients was really resonating with me.  As I read and re-read the description, I kept coming back to this one bothersome thing.  Everything was tossed in a “curry mayonnaise dressing.” 

Bourbon Pecan Pie

The Food Police were out in full effect…in my brain, that is. 

Curry? Check.  Good and healthy.

Mayonnaise?  Not so much.

My first inclination was to move on to a less offensive option, but no matter how many pages of the menu I turned, I still kept coming back to the wrap.  And then it dawned on me that one meal was not going to make me fat.  I tell my clients this every day, yet sometimes I still have to remind myself.  My body wanted those ingredients.  I was hungry, and I knew that this would satisfy me.

So I had that wrap.  And I enjoyed it in true guilt-free fashion.  I then went on the split a piece of bourbon pecan pie with my sister.  It. Was. Good.

And this, My Dear, is the beauty of intuitive eating.  Listening to my body.  Enjoying the moment.  Savoring the food now without calculating the impact on my thighs.  Addressing the craving…and then moving on.

The beauty of intuitive eating is a post from: Amber O'Neal

The beauty of intuitive eating ©, .

Principles of Mindfulness:
• Mindfulness is deliberately paying attention, non-judgmentally.
• Mindfulness encompasses both internal processes and external environments.
• Mindfulness is being aware of what is present for you mentally, emotionally and physically in each moment.
• With practice, mindfulness cultivates the possibility of freeing yourself of reactive, habitual patterns of thinking, feeling and acting.
• Mindfulness promotes balance, choice, wisdom and acceptance of what is.

Mindful Eating is:
• Allowing yourself to become aware of the positive and nurturing
opportunities that are available through food preparation and consumption by respecting your own inner wisdom.
• Choosing to eat food that is both pleasing to you and nourishing to your body by using all your senses to explore, savor and taste.
• Acknowledging responses to food (likes, neutral or dislikes) without judgment.
• Learning to be aware of physical hunger and satiety cues to guide your decision to begin eating and to stop eating.

Someone Who Eats Mindfully:
• Acknowledges that there is no right or wrong way to eat but varying degrees of awareness surrounding the experience of food.
• Accepts that his/her eating experiences are unique.
• Is an individual who by choice, directs his/her awareness to all aspects of food and eating on a moment-by-moment basis.
• Is an individual who looks at the immediate choices and direct experiences associated with food and eating: not to the distant health outcome of that choice.
• Is aware of and reflects on the effects caused by unmindful eating.
• Experiences insight about how he/she can act to achieve specific health goals as he/she becomes more attuned to the direct experience of eating and feelings of health.
• Becomes aware of the interconnection of earth, living beings, and cultural practices and the impact of his/ her food choices has on those systems.

The Principles are also available as a PDF to download and print: The Principles of Mindful Eating

Principles of Mindful Eating is a post from: Amber O'Neal

Principles of Mindful Eating ©, .

On this call, you will:

1. Uncover the DNA of the four most common eating paths
2. Learn about the consequences and benefits of each path
3. Discover which eating path leads to lasting weight loss and finding your Sweet Spot on the scale

Teleseminar Details:

Date: Thursday, July 29th
Time: 12pm to 1pm EST (check the time in your area)
Cost: Gratis. Complimentary. No charge. In other words…It’s FREE.
Where: By telephone (call-in information will be sent to you by email when you register below)

You won’t want to miss the energy of the live call or the opportunity for some down ‘n’ dirty Q&A, but register for the teleseminar even if you can’t make it because I’ll email you the recording afterwards.

Teleseminar: The Eating Path to Lasting Weight Loss is a post from: Amber O'Neal

Teleseminar: The Eating Path to Lasting Weight Loss ©, .